Feb
2010

Sex, Lies & Wedding Bells
Chapter 1


Rainbow Awards Finalist in 2 Categories

Coffee Time Recommended Read &
TwoLips Reviewer's Choice

from Ravenous Romance
M/M contemporary erotic romance
248 pages

ISBN:  978-1-60777-064-7
Price: US$ 4.99, $12.99 print from Amazon 

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When columnist Kieran Quinn goes to Texas to cover the latest wedding of a real-life "runaway bride," he falls hard for the gorgeous—and straight—groom. Jaxon Lang is the handsome, confident high school principal in a tiny Texas town. Kieran's charm and unique attitudes about sex and attraction soon challenge Jaxon's concept of what—and who—he wants. Will anything change when Kieran discovers the bride's been keeping a shocking secret?

 

CHAPTER ONE

 

Copyright © 2009 by E.M. Lynley

 

Ravenous Romance

100 Cummings Center

Suite 125G

Beverly, MA 01915

 

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher, except by reviewers who may quote brief excerpts in connection with a review.

 

ISBN-13: 978-1-60777-094-7

 

This book is a work of fiction, and any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. 

 

 

Chapter One

 

Thursday

New York City

The first thing Kieran noticed when he woke up was something warm and wet on his cock. He let out a small moan, enjoying the sensations. He remembered leaving Brut—his favorite club, just a few blocks from his place—with a model. He couldn’t quite remember which one, not that it mattered: Based on what the guy was doing to his cock, Kieran had made a good choice. He slowly opened his eyes and saw a pair of big blue eyes staring right back at him with a mischievous glint. Ah, yes. Now he remembered.

Kieran had no idea what the guy’s name was, but his face was more than familiar. Just about everyone in the city had seen it, 10 times larger than life, looking down from a Times Square billboard and the sides of countless city buses. Now that same mouth with its full pink lips was wrapped around Kieran’s cock. He couldn’t think of anywhere he’d rather be at the moment. The guy—Rod?—swirled his tongue around the head of Kieran’s cock and flicked across the sensitive bundle of nerves on the underside. He took most of Kieran into his mouth, the tip of his cock just brushing against the back of Rod’s throat. He let out a groan that vibrated all the way down Kieran’s cock. Warmth flooded across Kieran’s belly, gradually becoming an ache in his balls. He sat up and tugged at Rod’s shoulder-length blonde hair. Rod looked up at him with his cornflower blue eyes again and Kieran pulled Rod onto his lap and kissed him deeply, his cock sliding along the cleft of Rod’s ass. Rod moaned into the kiss and let himself melt against Kieran’s chest.

“No biting,” Rod said, as Kieran scraped his teeth along one shoulder.

Damn underwear models and their rules, Kieran thought, and pulled his lips over his teeth. He knew Rod couldn’t show up for a photo shoot with teeth marks on his perfect body. Memories flooded back to Kieran: Rod mentioned he was doing a new shoot in which he’d be completely nude, with just someone’s leg thrown across his crotch area. A men’s fragrance ad with the tagline “It’s all I wear to bed,” or something along those lines. Can’t wait to see the billboard for that one, Kieran thought, looking at the real thing in his lap.

Kieran put his hands on Rod’s hips and lifted him slightly, settling him onto his back, legs still wrapped around his waist, heels pressing into the small of his back. Rod let out a throaty sigh and relaxed back onto the lapis-colored, 800-threadcount sheets and spread his legs wide. Kieran admired the view of Rod’s even tan on smooth, firm flesh and reached over to the bedside table to grab a condom. Rod pulled the packet slowly from Kieran’s fingers and ripped it open using his teeth, never letting his eyes off Kieran’s, conveying his own need and arousal as effectively as his erection did. He rolled the condom onto Kieran’s hardness and gracefully hooked one knee over Kieran’s shoulder while he waited for Kieran to apply extra lube to his cock.

Kieran tentatively pushed one slick finger into Rod and met no resistance. He added another. Rod was more than ready and Kieran wasted no time pressing the tip of his cock against Rod’s slippery hole and plunging inside with one smooth move that overwhelmed his senses. Rod moaned as he took Kieran in, encouraging and increasing Kieran’s own pleasure at the tight, hot grip of Rod’s ass around his cock. It felt just as good as it had the two previous times he’d fucked Rod, before they’d both fallen into a deep, sated sleep in the early hours of the morning.

On top of Rod like this, Kieran couldn’t really see as much of the man’s gorgeous body as he would like; so he slowed his thrusts before either of them got too close to orgasm, wanting a better view. Kieran sat at the edge of the bed, facing the large mirror door of his closet and pulled Rod back into his lap, back-to-front, Rod’s legs straddling Kieran’s.

“I want to see how beautiful you are,” Kieran mumbled huskily, “and watch you lose control.” He helped Rod ease himself down onto Kieran’s cock. With his and hands on Rod’s hips, Kieran easily moved him up and down as he watched in the mirror.

“God,” Rod moaned, “yeah, just keep…fucking me…like…that.”

Rod’s head was thrown back against Kieran’s shoulder, legs splayed wide so Kieran could stroke and play with his cock and fondle his balls as Rod fucked himself down on Kieran with an uneven rhythm. It didn’t take long before Rod was so fucked out he could barely move on his own and Kieran had to do most of the work. That was fine with Kieran; he loved seeing a guy this far gone

Kieran had Rod coming with a few skillful strokes, shooting thick creamy jets up across his chest and shuddering around Kieran’s cock as he grunted and sighed with his orgasm, whispering a few mouthfuls of delightfully filthy comments. Kieran came a moment later, still feeling Rod’s aftershocks squeezing his cock, trying to keep his own eyes open so he could enjoy watching Rod as he pumped his own release inside him. The nearly dead weight of Rod’s body in his lap intensified Kieran’s own pleasure, as his orgasm ripped through his body, pleasurable sensations ricocheting and reverberating along every inch of his skin and leaving him spent and exhausted and perfectly satisfied.

Kieran lay back, pulling Rod along with him. They lay quietly while their breathing returned to normal. Then Rod slipped out of bed and into the bathroom, and Kieran was surprised to hear the shower start. He disposed of the condom in a trash can next to the bed and waited, reliving the activities and enjoying his own afterglow. Rod took a surprisingly short shower and came back into the bedroom with just a few droplets of water on his beautiful nude body as he toweled his long, damp hair.

“Got any coffee?” he asked, bending bent down to collect his scattered clothes from the floor.

“Sorry, no. I usually go out for breakfast.” Kieran sat up in bed and watched Rod dress himself. “Want to come along?”
“I’m late as it is,” Rod said, not bothering to button his shirt. He slipped on his jeans, socks and shoes hurriedly before leaning down and brushing his lips against Kieran’s. Rod’s hand slid down Kieran’s chest gently stroked his cock one last time before Rod  straightened up and left, waving a farewell.

“Bye, Rod,” Kieran said.

Todd,” Todd-not-Rod corrected with an annoyed look, then turned on his heel and left. Only slightly embarrassed, Kieran listened as Todd let himself out the front door; and then with a heavy sigh padded into the bathroom to shower and get his own day started. He had to go into the magazine’s office, and by the time he had breakfast it would be close to noon. No matter, he decided as he shampooed his hair. He’d already turned in his column the evening before by e-mail. All he needed was to get final approval from his editor.

Once Kieran washed and dressed, the only clue to his late-night and morning activities was the broad smile on his face as he walked out the front door of his building’s lobby. He rounded the corner of his street and walked half a block to the tiny diner where he had most of his breakfasts. Inside he was greeted with warm smiles and cheerful waves by the two waitresses on duty, and seated himself in a booth near the window. Kieran liked watching people pass by on the street while he ate. He ordered a vegetable and cheese omelet, hash browns, and a fruit salad. His food arrived quickly and while he ate, his mind went over the night and morning he’d spent with Todd.

            Physically, there was nothing to complain about. He’d been more than satisfied in that regard. But Kieran still felt that there had to be something more than what he and Todd had shared. Once again, here he was having breakfast—more like brunch, considering the hour—on his own, the way he did nearly every day. It was a seemingly endless parade of hot guys who had been to his place or with whom he’d gone home. Last night’s guest was one of the few who spent the whole night; but Kieran would much rather have woken up in someone’s arms than someone’s mouth. He’d even asked Rod—Todd, he reminded himself—to have breakfast, and that was certainly a break from the usual routine.

It wasn’t as if they’d had anything to talk about; but Kieran had at least tried for more than a few pleasant hours in bed with the guy. It might have gone better if I remembered his correct name, Kieran thought, but reminded himself Todd had already turned down the breakfast invitation before Kieran’s faux pas.



 

* * * * * 

 

Kieran finally rolled into the office of Gloss magazine—a New Yorker-style literary weekly aimed at a younger audience—well past noon, and got a mixed response of smiles and murderous glares from his coworkers. One person went so far as to mutter “Prima fucking donna” under her breath. Kieran was unfazed. He smiled his usual million-watt smile and greeted everyone cheerfully as he set his six-foot, four-inch frame at his desk in the center of an old-fashioned bullpen writers’ room. He was still in a fantastic mood after the night—and morning—he’d spent with Todd, a guy who undoubtedly everyone in this room would recognize.

He was quietly humming as he tugged at his half-tucked shirttail, fanning himself to help the cool air-conditioned breeze counteract Manhattan’s muggy, mid-May heat. Might as well give them a show if they’re still staring, Kieran thought as he treated half the room to a nice view of his chiseled abs. Makes all those hours in the gym worth it, he thought as he heard several people sigh. Smiling, Kieran settled into his chair and brushed damp strands of dark brown hair behind his ears.

“Kieran, nice to see you!” boomed a loud voice behind him, oozing sarcasm and irony.

“Jeff, hey!” Kieran replied cheerfully.

“Kieran, what does the sign on my door say?” Jeff asked, walking around to the back of Kieran’s desk and perching himself on its edge. In one hand he had a rolled-up sheaf of papers which he thwacked against the palm of his other hand menacingly.

“Morgan Jeffries, editor,” Kieran replied, wrinkling his brow. He hadn’t expected a pop quiz. Jeffries preferred to be called “Jeff” rather than any permutation of his first name; in fact he loathed his first name, so it was best never uttered.

“Okay, good,” Jeff replied sardonically, “you noticed that. And what does the sign on your office say?”

“I don’t have an office?” Kieran replied, knitting his brows and wondering if it was a trick question. The conversation had attracted the attention of his coworkers. Kieran could hear a few people still tap-tap-tapping at their keyboards, but no one spoke.

“Precisely,” Jeff said cryptically. The entire room was silent now.

“Are you telling me I’m getting a promotion?” Kieran asked eagerly, his grin widening, flashing his sure-fire dimples.

“Uh, I wonder what the Magic 8-Ball would say about that. All signs point to fuck no.” Jeff leaned down into Kieran’s face, breathing the tuna fish he had for lunch onto Kieran. Snickers and giggles echoed around the room.

“Okay, then what are you telling me?” Kieran asked. He didn’t consider himself a slow learner, but he still wasn’t sure where this was going. He was here and he’d turned in his column—by e-mail—well before the five p.m. deadline.

“Kieran, do you like your job?” Jeff asked, leaning back again. Someone in the far corner snorted and Kieran’s eyes darted in that direction without moving his head.

“Yeah.” Kieran didn’t like the way the conversation was going. He’d been thrown off because Jeff had called him “Kieran.” When Jeff was angry at someone he used his surname instead.

“Then what the fuck is this?” Jeff demanded, smacking the roll of papers onto Kieran’s desk. The sheets fluttered to the floor. Kieran bent down awkwardly to retrieve the document, scanning to see what it was.

“Uh, my column—‘Crazy Things People Do to F ind Love’—for Sunday’s issue.” Kieran wrinkled his nose as he looked at the manuscript, squinting slightly and ruffling through the pages. Jeff was old-school and had started at a newspaper, hence the bullpen-style office. Jeff threw papers at some poor schmuck at least once a week. “I guess you don’t like it,” Kieran said as meekly as he could manage. He didn’t want to antagonize his boss in front of the entire department.

“No, I ‘don’t like it,’” Jeff replied, mimicking Kieran’s voice. “It’s too fucking nice, for fuck’s sake! Fuck, Kieran!” Jeff liked to say “fuck,” and averaged about one use per sentence. He was clearly making up for lost “fucks” so far in this conversation.

 

 

“Nice?”

“Too fucking nice,” Jeff repeated. “We don’t pay you to write nice interesting little columns with heart and hope and happy endings. We pay you to be bitchy and snarky and enter-fucking-taining, for fuck’s sake. This is bo-ring! I wouldn’t use it wrap dog shit in! Come on! You talked to matchmakers and psychics and speed-fucking-daters and more crazy-ass lovelorn sons of bitches, and there was a fucking fuckload of potential for snark here, and you end up writing some fucking sympathetic piece about how hard it is to find ‘love in the big city.’” Jeff mocked. “Fix it the fuck up or pack your fucking desk and get a job at Redbook or Ladies’ Home Fucking Journal. Got it?”

“Fuck yes?” Kieran ventured with a grin. Jeff didn’t return the smile. He had managed to say “fuck” 14 times; a personal best for one conversation, Kieran mused. When he started working here, he found himself counting “fucks” rather than paying attention to what Jeff was actually saying. After three years of practice, Kieran could listen and count “fucks” at the same time.

“Deadline is five p.m., which gives you four hours to get me a new draft. Or to pack. Your choice, Quinn.” Jeff stormed back to his office. Eyes followed Jeff until he slammed the door behind him. Then everyone stared at Kieran.

“Thanks, all y’all, for your concern about my well-being,” Kieran said in his sweetest, most drawling native Texas accent. “Now mind your own fucking business!” He added in his normal, only barely-a-trace-of-an-accent-voice, and smiled a huge, pleasant and clearly facetious smile, showing most of his large and very pearly whites.

Kieran booted up his computer and opened the file to edit his column. Slowly, the room returned to its normal level of noise and activity. Everyone was used to Jeff’s weekly tirades, but Kieran hadn’t been the object of Jeff’s disaffection for quite a while. A lot of the other staffers thought he deserved it, the way he swanned in—never swished, despite what some people might say—at all hours of the day and consistently turned things in at the last minute. But no one disputed he was one of the most talented and most popular writers—at least with the readers—at Gloss. His columns invariably generated hundreds of letters and e-mails, a mixture of plaudits and complaints, but the magazine didn’t care, as long as people were buying and reading it. The circulation department discovered a good number of people bought the thing just for Kieran’s column.

The company intentionally didn’t post Kieran’s columns on Gloss’s Web site in order to force people to buy the magazine. The tactic worked. Circulation was at an all-time high: Quite a feat, given the Internet had caused most magazines and newspapers to lose huge portions of their print readership.

Almost four hours later, Kieran had been to the coffee cart in the lobby three times and was so hopped up on sugar and caffeine he couldn’t sit still. He furiously tapped away at his keyboard, banging one knee rhythmically against his desk, and occasionally muttering to himself. Several co-workers stared at him, probably wishing Kieran hadn’t shown up in the office after all. The feature writers had the option of working at home a couple of days a week, if their jobs allowed—the news writers clearly couldn’t—but everyone was expected to be in the office on the day of deadline; preferably before noon. The room now was nearly empty, as the writers who had already turned in their stories went home or off to live their lives.

“So, Kieran, how’s the rewrite going?” Chad Raines asked from a few desks away. He was Kieran’s closest friend at Gloss, and possibly outside of work, as well. He reviewed films for the magazine’s entertainment section. Kieran imagined Chad’s job consisted of sitting around in the dark watching movies all day, then coming in on deadline day to turn in his columns. But Chad probably only got half the salary Kieran did. Chad looked and sounded like a California surfer: light brown hair streaked with golden highlights, which was odd considering he’d come from Vermont. Maybe he’d watched too many films and was just playing the part.

“Great, Chad,” Kieran replied with mock-enthusiasm, not looking up from his monitor. “It’s the best fucking thing I’ve written.”

“Really?” Chad asked. Irony was usually lost on him.

“No, Chad, it’s going to end up like Franken-fucking-stein when I’m done. A little of this and a little of that, all sewn up with some bitchy snarkiness, and then some snarky bitchiness with a dollop of irony and sarcasm on top for good measure.”

“So what’s got your thong in a twist, dude?”

“I don’t know, Chad,” Kieran replied, sighing deeply and sprawling back in his chair. He pushed off from his desk and rolled the seat backwards into the desk directly behind his. Alexa Harrington, Gloss’ restaurant reviewer and another of his good friends, sat there. She grabbed a handful of Kieran’s hair. He yelped.

“For fuck’s sake, Lex, that fucking hurt!” Kieran shouted, rubbing his head, but his smile said he wasn’t really angry.

“Hm, sounds like Mr. Grumpy Pants is trying for Jeff’s job or something,” Alexa said with a laugh. She spent most of her time in New York, but every other week she spent a few days in another city to try new restaurants, interview celebrity chefs, and follow up on food and taste trends around the country. Kieran was sure she had the best job at the magzine; and Alexa was sure he had only befriended her so he could eat fantastic food for free. She usually ordered five appetizers and five entrees at each restaurant, plus a few desserts; someone had to eat all that extra food, Kieran reasoned to her. Slim, petite, elegant Alexa could actually pack away a lot more than anyone might expect, but not that much.

“I just don’t feel right making fun of some of the people I interviewed for this piece,” Kieran admitted. “This matchmaker, for example. She was the sweetest little grandmotherly thing. She actually did remind me of my grandmother. I can’t bring myself to mock her.”

“So, just mock the people who go to her,” Chad suggested. “Or maybe you should have interviewed a few different matchmakers so you would have one you didn’t like that you could really rip to shreds.”

“I’m surprised people even agree to let you interview them,” Alexa said. “You’re known for making people the butt of jokes or embarrassing them. How do you manage to convince anyone to talk to you?”

“It’s his country boy charm and good looks,” Chad answered, “and the killer smile. I’m still in awe of the way you can get nearly anyone to not only want to get in your pants, but to think they actually have a chance: male, female, any age or sexual orientation. What’s your secret?”

Kieran didn’t bother to protest. He did abuse that ability, thanks to his mixture of good looks, hours spent in the gym, and a genuinely engaging personality. But he was the first to admit he’d been pretty lazy on this piece. He definitely should have interviewed more people, but was taken with the matchmaker and spent too much time chatting with her. She was quite successful at pairing up couples, many of whom had stayed together for years. Kieran had half-considered asking her to help him, since he had no luck finding love in the big city. The night before aside. Then again that wasn’t love, that was fucking, he reminded himself, and he knew the difference.

The whole theme of the column had hit a bit too close to home for him, and he’d gone into it with entirely too much empathy for who Jeff called the “lovelorn sons of bitches.” Kieran thought he could use some help in that department himself. He didn’t want to spend the rest of his life picking up hot guys from bars. He really did want to find someone special and settle down, but he seemed to be much more successful with the underwear models than with anyone who could actually be his soulmate.

He’d had a lot of fun interviewing the psychic, too. She did readings out of her tiny apartment in Brooklyn and he’d gone over there twice after the initial visit, rather than just calling her. Of course he didn’t really believe in any of that paranormal stuff, and he knew she used attention to detail to “read” his personality and what his problems might be, but she had said something that had gotten his attention. He was going to meet his soul mate sometime soon, she predicted, and it would be a complete surprise to both of them. The person would be seeking Kieran’s help for a serious problem, she continued, mentioning something cryptic about a “baby who wasn’t there,” whatever that meant.

“Earth to Quinn,” Chad said, startling Kieran out of his thoughts. “You’ve got less than half an hour to finish that column and get your topic for the next issue outlined. Are you going to manage it?” Gloss had writers plan out their work two issues in advance so they could manage space and advertising requirements.

“Huh? The outline is due today?” Chad had Kieran’s full attention. “I thought that wasn’t due until tomorrow?” An extra 24 hours could do wonders in Kieran’s experience. Hell, he’d written entire columns in less time.

“Oh, right, you weren’t here the other afternoon when Jeff announced the new schedule,” Alexa said. “Now we have to turn in the new outline along with the story for the current issue. I guess bankers’—make that underwear models’—hours can be a bitch, huh?” she teased. She knew him all too well.

“Figures,” he complained. “He probably said that just because I wasn’t here.”

“Well, there was an e-mail, too,” Chad said.

“I never read emails from Jeff,” Kieran said, a touch of concern creeping into his voice. A lot of Jeff’s e-mails ended up in the spam folder, filtered out for having the word “fuck” in there. Kieran hoped he hadn’t deleted everything in the trash folder in his e-mail program. He wondered what else he might have missed. Kieran loved research and interviewing people, and of course the writing, but he hated the planning and outlining Jeff was so keen on. “I don’t have a clue what I’m doing two weeks from now!”

“Well, do you at least have this week’s column finished?” Alexa asked. “Or are you gonna pack your fucking desk?”

“Yeah, just about done,” Kieran said, wheeling himself back to his desk and taking one more look at what he hoped was the finished column. Just then a trim, good-looking guy with dark, shoulder-length hair approached Kieran’s desk, delivering mail from a pushcart.

“Hi, Kieran,” Chris-the-mailroom-guy said cheerfully. That was how most people referred to him. “I can’t wait to read your next column; I hear it’s about finding love.” He was obviously flirting. Kieran tried not to glare at him, and flashed a toned-down version of his normal smile. He didn’t want Chris getting the wrong idea—although it was probably far too late to avoid that.

“Yeah, Chris, something like that, if I can get it done in the next ten minutes,” Kieran said in a tone that let Chris know the conversation was over without directly snubbing him. Chris didn’t seem to notice the undertone and headed to the next desk, swaying his hips. Kieran rolled his eyes and turned back to the monitor, ignoring the huge pile of mail Chris dropped on his desk.

“Looks like love might have found you, Kieran,” Chad said with a smirk once Chris was out of earshot.

“No, Chad,” Alexa said, laughing. “That wasn’t love, that was fucking.” She mimicked Kieran’s voice almost perfectly as she uttered one of his key phrases.

“Hey, do we have to have this conversation here, now?” Kieran asked, exasperated his personal life was common knowledge around the room. He looked around and realized the three of them were the only ones still left, except for the book reviewer—the short, balding Eric Johnson or Thomson or something equally as generic and forgettable—whose desk was over in the corner. Eric had a crush on Alexa and usually stayed until she left. He’d hardly ever even spoken to her, and Kieran always dared her to ask him out or unbutton her top in front of his desk. Alexa didn’t go much for dares, but every now and then she’d glance over at Eric and he’d scurry around his desk looking for something, or hide his head in his book.

“I still think it’s so fucking hilarious you went home with Chris-the-mailroom-guy from a bar, and then found out he worked here!” Chris cried with a laugh. “And he’s got the biggest crush on you. I’ll bet a week’s salary he followed you to that bar in the first place, hoping you’d pick him up.” Chad nearly choked with mirth at Kieran’s obvious discomfort.

To Kieran, the whole point of one-night stands was simply that: it was only supposed to be one night. You were supposed to fuck him and forget him. They weren’t supposed to show up at your desk everyday making puppy-dog eyes hoping you’d ask them out again. It was no wonder Kieran preferred to work from home as often as possible. If he’d had found any sort of deeper connection with Chris, it wouldn’t have ended up as a one-night stand in the first place.

“It’s so cute, the two of you together,” Alexa added in a saccharine tone.  Kieran ignored both of them, focusing instead on finishing his column by the deadline.

“Okay, this is done!” Kieran announced 10 minutes later. He hit the enter key with a flourish and e-mailed the final draft of his column to Jeff. Chad and Alexa applauded.

“What about you guys? Almost done?” Kieran asked.

“Yeah,” Chad answered. “Jeff approved my final draft hours ago.”

“Me, too,” Alexa chimed in. “We’re just here offering you moral support.”

“And mocking my unfortunate sexual encounters,” Kieran added wryly. He smiled, happy his friends stuck around until he got his piece done.

“We’ll stay ’til Jeff signs off on the piece, and then we’ll let you take us out for drinks to show your gratitude,” Chad said.

“I see money does buy companionship, if not respect,” Kieran said.

While waiting for Jeff’s final approval on his column, Kieran needed to find something to write about for the future issue. He glanced at the pile of letters on his desk. An idea formed in his head. How about writing about the people who write me letters? He could pick a few choice ones, call the people up, and speak with them. He would need to figure out what the angle of the piece would be, but figured something would come to him after chatting with a few of them. Kieran grabbed the pile of letters and flipped through them, looking for interesting return addresses or uncommon names that would make good fodder for ridicule.

One envelope made of thick pearly beige paper with a return address of Buckwheat Springs, Texas, caught his eye. Kieran had never heard of the town, and figured it must be one of those wayward spots in the middle of nowhere with a population of five people, 500 cows, and 20 pickup trucks. The envelope smacked of a wedding invitation, but Kieran’s mind was a blank.

“Hey, I got invited to a wedding, I think, by one of my readers,” Kieran said excitedly. He tore the envelope open and read out loud:

“‘Mr. and Mrs. Robert Harris request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter Danetta and Jaxon’—with a fucking X!—‘Lang.’ Hell, I don’t know these people. There isn’t even a letter in here explaining who they are or why I’m invited.”

“Hang on,” Alexa said. “Did you say Danetta Harris?”

“Yeah,” Kieran said. “Why? What the fuck kind of name is Danetta anyway? Of course she’d have to marry someone with an ‘X’ in his name.”

“I went to college with her,” Alexa replied.

Kieran took a good look at the envelope and saw it was addressed to Alexa, not him. Chris obviously isn’t as good at sorting mail as he is at sucking cock, Kieran thought with a laugh. Poor guy is going to have to sleep his way to a better job.

“Sorry, I didn’t realize it’s actually for you. It was in my pile of letters.” Kieran handed over the invitation.

“Well, how interesting,” Alexa said, reading it over. “The wedding is next weekend, and I’m just getting an invitation now? I guess I was on the second string.”

“Are you going to go?” Chad asked, coming over and perching on the edge of Alexa’s desk.

“No, for a few reasons,” she said. “Firstly, I have to be in Napa that weekend for a winemaker’s event.”

“Oh, poor thing,” Chad moaned. “The agony!”

 Alexa ignored him. “Second,” she continued, “I’m annoyed to be invited so late. And third, get this. This is the fourth wedding invitation I’ve gotten from Danetta over the past five or six years. And she’s still not married yet.”

“Fourth? What d’you mean?” Kieran asked.

“Well, I missed the first wedding. It was before we were really friends, but I went to the next two. And at all of them she decided—at the altar—she didn’t want to get married after all!” Alexa shrieked with laughter.

“You’re saying she dumped the guy in the middle of the wedding?” Kieran was dumbfounded.

“Yeah. Twice.” Alexa couldn’t say more because she was laughing so hard. “Well, twice I saw, and then one more time when I wasn’t there, but it was while she was still in college.”

“Oh, that’s hilarious,” Chad said. “Well, maybe not for the guy, but to plan a whole wedding and then just wait until the last minute to cut and run?”

“Well, it’s too bad if it happens once, but she’s done it three times. I haven’t gotten an invitation for a couple of years—so maybe now she’s serious?”

“Hang on a minute,” Kieran interrupted. “I saw this in a movie!” He wondered why Chad hadn’t recognized the storyline by now. Just shows he must be faking it, Kieran decided. “Does this chick think she’s Julia Roberts or something? I mean come on, no one does something like that for real.”

“Danetta has,” Alexa replied. “Yeah, it does sound like that movie, doesn’t it? Stupid film. I hated it.”

“Lex, you should go just in case,” Chad suggested. “Richard Gere might be there!” he added, proving he’d least heard of the film.

“Shut up, Chad!” Alexa laughed.

“What kind of shit-for-brains guy would even date her; much less propose to her with that track record?” Kieran wondered aloud, shaking his head in disbelief. “Guys, I’m getting an idea here. I can do a column on the wedding! What do you think?”

“What’s the angle?” Chad asked.

“I could focus on Danetta, and how she’s such a flake. She is a flake, right Lex?”

“First class.”

“That could work, but it doesn’t quite do it for me,” Chad said. “Real-life Runaway Bride; that’s not exactly original, is it? You need some other spin to make it fly.”

“Okay.” Kieran paused, the wheels turning in his head as he sought a more original slant that would be snarky enough to a travel budget  approved. “Okay, okay, how’s this? I focus on the guy. Guys, I guess. I can interview the first three to try finding out what her secret is for getting all these proposals. Then I can focus on the current one—what’s his name?”

“Jaxon,” Alexa read from the invitation.

“Danetta and Jaxon. How on earth do people come up with these names for their kids in that town? I never heard of either of those names. But anyway, so I hang out with Jaxon a couple of days before the wedding, see how he’s dealing with the uncertainty of whether she will or won’t actually marry him.”

“Yeah, that’s good,” Chad said encouragingly. “What about something on how to avoid this happening to you?”

“Good, good.” Kieran was on a roll now with their brainstorming. “And of course it will be easy to make him look like a fool for even asking her to marry him, considering her past behavior. And if she bails again, I can really go to town on him.”

“Kieran, I think you’ve done it,” Alexa said. “Now hurry up! Write up the proposal, send it off to Jeff, and let’s get to the bar.”

“She’s having cosmo withdrawal, I can tell,” Chad said.

“I am so over cosmos, Chad,” she chided him. “It’s pomegranate martinis now.”

They leaned over Kieran’s shoulders as he outlined his idea, correcting his punctuation and mocking his overuse of adverbs while he tried to type. He did his best to ignore them, and when he was fairly satisfied with the proposal he emailed it Jeff.

“So, Kieran, tomorrow let me call Danetta and tell her you’ll be going to the wedding in my place,” Alexa offered.

“That’d be great, thanks, Lex,” Kieran replied. “I’m going to have to spin it differently for her if I want to get a chance to interview her and Jordan before the wedding.”

“Jaxon,” Chad and Alexa corrected.

Jordan was actually the name of groom number two,” Alexa said.

“Whatever. So, how about if you tell her I’m there to do a column about how this time she’s so sure, and how in love they are and…” Kieran stopped talking, eyes on the ceiling. “Hey, could she be pregnant? ‘Cause if she is, she might be more likely to go through with it this time. That would fuck everything up for the story.”

“Well, I’ll see if I can find out when I talk to her,” Alexa said.

“Anyway, we’ll make her think my angle is how this time it’s right, and how special and different things are with Justin. He’s totally Mr. Perfect,” Kieran mocked.

Jaxon,” Chad and Alexa said again.

“Yeah, I know. How could I possibly forget a name like that?”

They all turned around when they heard Jeff’s door bang open.

“Quinn, in my office, now!” Jeff roared out of the open door.

“How about we just meet you at the bar?” Chad suggested. “Boulud okay?”

“Wow, I’m generous tonight, huh?” Kieran asked. He walked toward Jeff’s office as his friends gathered their things to go. “How about Brut instead?” Kieran shouted over his shoulder. He’d rather they went to the small champagne bar close to his SoHo apartment rather than the most expensive restaurant in town. There was someone he was hoping to run into there.


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