{"id":698,"date":"2009-11-12T05:25:12","date_gmt":"2009-11-12T13:25:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/?p=698"},"modified":"2009-11-12T07:22:41","modified_gmt":"2009-11-12T15:22:41","slug":"cock-talk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/cock-talk\/","title":{"rendered":"Cock Talk"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"don-jose-underwear-0\"We can’t possibly do justice to this week’s theme without having a contest to find with the best and the worst euphemisms for “penis” that you’ve heard or read.<\/p>\n

Purple-prose romances started the trend with quivering manhood and throbbing need and many many other forgettable phrases. Recently, gay and m\/m fiction has made it okay to call a cock a cock. But there are still plenty of those ridiculous phrases kicking around–in our memories or in books that don’t take the risk of showing us what goes on behind those closed doors. Thankfully in our books, just about nothing happens behind closed doors. In fact it rarely even happens in bedrooms, and that’s exactly the way we like it!<\/p>\n

Please leave a comment with your own entries and feel free to comment on the ones other people mention. I’ll attempt to edit this post keep up with the comments, but if we get too many it might not be possible. Later this week we’ll have a vote on the hottest and the most cringe-worthy phrases.<\/p>\n

[WIN<\/span>: Everyone who comments will be entered to win a copy of “A Heat.Seeking.Missile.” by EM Lynley. Yup, I went there. ]<\/strong><\/p>\n

I’ll start off with one of my (least) favorites, baloney pony.\u00a0 I hope never to see it used in a book or I’ll stop reading immediately. But on its own, it’s pretty damn funny.<\/p>\n

My favorite word to use is “cock.” Probably no surprise given the title of this event! I’ve always liked the word–how it sounds, how it feels to say it. In fact, when I moved back to the US from London after grad school, my best friend organized my going-away party at a pub called The Cock. Now, it’s not quite as bad as it sounds…the pub across the street was called The Hen & Chicks. But I still liked the idea of how dirty the name seems on its own!<\/p>\n

Click “MORE” to see the list!<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

The list: baloney pony, disco stick,\u00a0 Purple-headed womb ferret, One-eyed cockatiel, Man axe, Man sword, Manroot, purple-helmeted warrior, one-eyed wonder-worm, distended organ (urg\u2026 sounds like a stomach problem), glistening man-tool, tootsie roll, man-meat, man-muscle, jizz-pump, boy parts, marriage tackle (my favorite, actually), trouser snake (hee hee\u2013still brings out my 13 year old virgin), THING, dumb stick (still use that one), schwing thing, boner, woody, flag pole\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We can’t possibly do justice to this week’s theme without having a contest to find with the best and the worst euphemisms for “penis” that you’ve heard or read. Purple-prose romances started the trend with quivering manhood and throbbing need and many many other forgettable phrases. Recently, gay and m\/m fiction has made it okay […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":63,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[25,52],"tags":[103,912,919],"class_list":["post-698","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-contest","category-event","tag-cocktoberfest","tag-contest","tag-discussion"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pzLgx-bg","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/698","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/63"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=698"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/698\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=698"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=698"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emlynley.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=698"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}